What do you think of when you hear the word “salesman?”
I think of the Wolf of Wall Street, the movie Glengarry Glen Ross or a used car salesman. My first thought is of someone who will stop at nothing to get what they want.
That’s unfortunate because we are selling to each other all the time – our ideas, our beliefs, our products.
- Pitching my company Zander Media to a client → selling
- Trying to get my 11 year old nephew to eat his broccoli → selling
- Even when I’m trying to get my border collie Riley to behave → that’s selling.
But what are the core characteristics of selling? There are three:
Connection – form an authentic connection with the other person.
Story – tell a story that is authentic to you and resonates with the person you are selling to.
Ask – Invite powerfully towards the outcome that you want.
Authentic Connection
When I was five years old, my father had me plant pumpkin seeds to grow pumpkins for Halloween.
Together with a couple of neighborhood boys, I stood in the street, waved down cars and asked them if they’d like to buy my pumpkins.
Because, even then, I was a bit ridiculous, often I dressed in a full body scarecrow costume – passers by would speculate if I was a motion-activated robot – and would then tear off my costume to chase down cars.
That childlike enthusiasm to sell something that I’d worked hard to grow is authentic for me. I’m excitable and playful. That exuberance allowed me to connect with my customers.
Whenever you are selling – a product or an idea – look to share yourself with the person you are selling to. Be yourself and you’ll be more likely to create a real relationship with your customer.
That authentically connection is why, when I visit my hometown, I still get asked if Robin’s Pumpkin Patch is coming back next Halloween.
Tell Them Stories
When I started Robin’s Cafe, I’d lived in the neighborhood for a decade.
That period was a time of transition in the Mission District in San Francisco. There were new companies moving into the neighborhood and a lot of local residents were feeling displaced. But that gentrification also came with benefits.
What had historically been an unsafe neighborhood was becoming a thoroughfare. What had been a parking lot across the street was turned into a playground.
As somebody who had lived and worked in the neighborhood for a decade, I bridged the gap between longtime residents and newly incoming tech. workers.
By relating my story, and listening to the stories of my neighbors, I was able to sell the idea of Robin’s Cafe as a community space that served the needs of the neighborhood.
By relating your own personal experiences, and listening thoughtfully to the personal experiences of others, you create the trust and connection which ultimately leads to sales.
The Ask
This final step is the part of a sale that salespeople call “closing.” The moment when you ask your prospective client, “Would you like to buy my thing?”
But I think closing is the wrong word because it gets the incentives backwards.
The goal isn’t to close a deal at any cost. Pressuring your customer to close a deal is more likely to result in a dissatisfied customer and long-term ill will.
Instead, invite them – powerfully – towards the outcome that you believe is best for them, while knowing that they are ultimately responsible for making their own decision.
Selling something can be as simple as forming an authentic connection, telling your story and listening to the other person, and then asking the other person if they would like to buy what you are selling.
Until next week,
Robin