Over the last four months, I’ve dealt with a death in the family, a friend’s mental health crisis, moving, an angry client, a new relationship, the news, and still trying to run my business. To state the obvious, it’s been a lot.
That depth of personal (and existential) overwhelm has me thinking about the tools I use to combat overwhelm, and to keep going when my tendency is to hide under the covers.
I’d never tried to describe my process for getting out of overwhelm, but having done that several times lately, I thought I’d write out my process.
Hopefully it’ll be useful for you, too! But at a minimum, I’ll refer back to this short article the next time I’m feeling like my internal world is falling apart!
Make a list
Last week, I was holding my head in my hands, having just snapped at my girlfriend, irritated by my dog’s whining, itchy with the need to exercise.
I paused, and wrote out a list of things that were top of mind:
- Should we buy that house?
- Renting vs. buying?
- Responsive Conference newsletter
- Snafu writing
- The Daily podcast
- Call Michelle
- Clients proposals
Make it a flow chart
Often, just seeing the number of things I’m trying to manage is enough. There’s a sense of relief. No wonder I’m feeling so overwhelmed!
But after listing out all of the dozens of things that I’m feeling overwhelmed with, my next step is to make them into some kind of order.
Of the things on your list, which one needs to be done right this moment, and which can wait an hour or a day?
In the case of my list, the questions about housing actually had to be tackled in order:
- First, we had to decide if we wanted to buy that house in Sonoma
- If not, then we could decide about renting vs. buying
- Then, where did we want to live
By listing out the variables that really can be put into a flow chart in the order in which they need to be addressed, you can handle the tension more easily.
Take one action
If I have one piece of advice for anyone, tackling any sort of challenge, it is to “Take action.” However small and no matter in what direction, when you just start, you begin to move things forward.
Movement generates momentum. As movement scientist Moshe Felendrkais said: “Without movement, life is unthinkable.” Forward momentum is the antidote to despair.
Take one action in some direction. More actions and resulting outcomes will come from there.
- Make a list
- Put items in a hierarchy or flow chart
- Take one small action
This isn’t to say that these three steps will solve any and all existential crises. But all too often I overwhelm myself with an abundance of small problems. Instead, when I tackle each in turn, they become achievable and I’m able to get out of my rut.